Interesting Thought..

Hey yo...

It's 11.30pm. I just got home and had an interesting thought so thought I'd share it with you:

So on a last minute whim, I decided to go out tonight after work with a few friends to check out Drewfunk's Art Exhibition (review coming soon so check back!!) in Newtown.

Didn't really know who was gonna turn up.

It ended up being some of the main crew...

He was there.

It was wierd.

The greeting between us was wierd.

No real physical thing to be honest. We may as well have been two snobby rich people air-kissing.
That's what it felt like.
That's how it would have looked like if we were were being filmed or if the scene was being described in a novel.

The vibe was cold.
And for a split second, I'll admit it: I was surprised and it did hurt.
But I got over it very quickly.

And as the night went on, I walked ahead.
I avoided having to speak to him.
Not even polite conversation.
If that's how he's gonna treat me, then he's just going to get it back.

I'm not the same girl I was last year...

Night.
chauie
'Doesn't matter what he says. I know he's no good for me' - Boom, Anjulie

Five Elements

I've worked out that I have five elements of my life - family, friends, study, work and love - and of late, only one of those elements is really making me happy. It's also probably the last one you would expect.

(5) Family
Families are supposed to be supportive towards your decisions in life, right?
Not mine.
My family always seems to question my choices.

(4) Love
My love life sis currently non-existent so there's not much to comment here but I'm not bitter about it. I've said this before and I'll say it again: I don't mind being single.
And I get that friends wanna set me up in hopes that I'll (eventually) be as happy as they are but we all have our own definition of happiness.
We all have different things in our life that makes us estatic and feel complete bliss.
That's why no two people are exactly the same.

(3) Work
Well if you're a regular reader of my blog (first off, thank you! hehe), you should know how I feel about work. But seriously though, with all the 'talking' that goes on, I don't know why people stay.
I don't even know why I'm still here.
I used to have reasons why I stuck around but now, even those reasons are fading away.

There was a toss-up between the last two elements. Both are what I love and hold close to my heart. But there was one that slightly held the upper hand in terms of my 'happy' levels, especially within the past couple of weeks.

(2) Friends
This is not directed to all my friends.
I just feel a bit out of the loop with some of them and it's not a great feeling...
To not know what is going on around you but have everyone else aware is a bit scary.
It's like I'm living in a bubble and I have no idea...
It's kinda sad when I really think about it. Sometimes it makes me feel like I'm the outsider looking in - even when I'm in the midst of it all.

And finally,
(1) Study
I told you it was the least expected one but honestly it's the only thing that's really providing a positive light into my life at the moment.
Knowing that I went out of my way to go out, research and apply for the course without asking for help or advice from others was good for me.
Doing something on just my own terms gave me a (thin) layer of confidence and was somewhat rewarding.

In the past, I've always let the voices of others influence my final decisions, but this time, I did this all on my own and initially (after I enrolled) I didn't even tell anyone that I'd done it - gone and taken that big step! Not until maybe a few weeks later, I slowly started revealing my (future) plans.

Even now, not all of my friends and family know. And coming from a highly competitive (academic-wise) and judgemental family (mainly the extended), I thought it was best to only tell my immediate...

It took me a while but I'm glad I finally realised what I wanted to do.
Through all the ups and downs, the fails and passes, I realise now they don't really matter anymore coz I didn't go about living my life based on those events.
I finally know what makes me happy and how I can incorporate what with how and hopefully achieve that complete sense of pure bliss. :0)

**A change is coming. **

Peace.
chauie
'Some people say that I'm not worth it. I've made mistakes but nobody's perfect. Guess I'll give it a try.' - One Last Chance, James Morrison

Anjulie

I've found a new artist I'm falling in love with.

With her exotic good looks and witty lyrics, singer and songwriter Anjulie is one of few artists that i like to call 'a breath of fresh air into the music scene'. :)

(picture credit: www.urb.com)

Born in Toronto, Canada but currently residing in Los Angeles, her melodies and her lyrics ooze a sense of fun into the self-penned songs of her debut self-titled album.

Her sound has been described by critics as similar to that of [fellow Canadian] 'Nelly Furtado with a touch of Duffy' - an electic mix if you will.

I prefer to say that her album sounds like hip hop mixed with pop with lyrics that are clever yet sweet. Her songs, especially the hooks, are catchy and I can't stop listening and singing along!

Her debut single 'Boom' is slowly getting the attention it deserves over here in Australia, but I'm sure we'll see more of this girl when the time comes for her to completely shine.

Until then, check out the official video:

Anjulie - Boom

Peace out.

chauie

Too Much Too Soon?

When starting a relationship, these days I've noticed, some couples just seem to go about it way too fast. Do the phrases 'Don't rush', or 'Let's take it one step at a time' not mean anything to anyone anymore?

I know that during the 'Honeymoon' phase we're all blinded by lust - not love. Love at first sight does not exist - not from what I've seen. The behaviour is always questionable.

Call me cynical if you like. I don't really care. This is just how I see it.

I'm not in a relationship but I remember an incident that happened not too long ago when a guy (who is no longer) in my life invited me out a couple of times. I didn't really know the guy so I gave him a chance.

You gotta take chances, coz then you'll never know right?

Maybe I should've skipped out on giving this guy a chance coz all of a sudden after two outings together, his best friend is sitting next to me telling me that the guy is "falling for me".

Woah.
Stop and rewind please.

How can you fall for someone so easily? So quickly?
I mean, I was flattered but it hit the line of desperate. The guy in question was older and we hardly knew each other. Aren't older guys supposed to be the mature ones? Or is that stereotyping and labelling them too much?

Anyways, I ran away from that guy pretty quickly. :P

But even those in relationships now are moving too fast. I have friends from all different groups and networks and I know at least one in each that I feel are (or have been) moving just a little too quickly in my opinion.

Six months in (or less) and I'm hearing about the four letter word, sex, possible marriage proposals, moving in together, etc. Some things just leave me speechless.

I'm not here to point the finger at anyone and insult them.

I just wanna know why?
Why the rush?
Why not stop and breathe and enjoy the moment in each other's company for a minute?

Is that too much to ask?

But I'm just someone on the outside looking in on these relationships around me so maybe it's different within the relationship but time is time.

As much as I would like to have a control of life and be able to press stop, pause, rewind or fast-forward, I can't and neither can you. Therefore, I think my opinion is fair in this case.

I know that life is short and we should 'seize the moment' but with relationships, you should take your time. If it doesn't last, it doesn't last. Be happy that you were able to enjoy all those past moments together rather than rushing through each one trying to create new ones.

If other people know about your 'rushed' relationship, there will be questions.
And if you question it, if you have ever questioned it at any point during the relationship, you can bet other people surely will also.

Excuse my mood (again).
chauie
'Gave you second chances. At least a hundred times, you're not the one, I am done' - Empty, Jessica Mauboy

The Comparision

Lately I feel like everyday at work feels like an episode of "Gossip Girl" minus the fashion. :P

I'm the only one walking around trying to look good for myself - not for the opposite sex! haha (just kidding.)

I've wrote about this again and again.

Work - my workplace - feels like (a) high-school with girls and boys running around chasing one another or talking about each other. Not ladies and gentlemen - boys and girls.

The people at work all love to talk - about the good and the bad.

Talk is cheap - that's why everyone does it.

As much as we try not to bitch about certain people and things happening around the office, sometimes the behaviour of some steps over the line and you find yourself exasperated with that particular person that you just need to let it out.

Sometimes to stop and breathe doesn't work.

Out.
chauie
'I see it around me, I see it in everything. I could be so much more than this' - My Sundown, Jimmy Eat World