Today Was A Great Day!

Today I found out some great news!

In relation to my writing that is... hehe

Jeff Staple (iconic streetwear designer whom I, and a few of the itches clan, met in Melbourne) liked MY review of the Buffet event!

The fact that he read the thirteen itches blog first of all is big news - major exposure for the label. But even bigger is him saying that he liked my review is soo awesome! Couldn't wipe the smile off my face hehe

Check out what he said:

"Check out the Thirteen Itches blog and Frank/Qubic’s blog for a great write-up from a local’s perspective."

This is a major compliment!!!

Even further, it tells me that I didn't make a mistake choosing to write for the rest of my life hehe

Anyways, you can check out Mr Staple's review here.

And above, well I had to add it in but it's a pic of he and I (and his fries!) in Melbourne after the Buffet forums :0)

January Update

I haven't really been blogging in regards to updates as of late and so I decided to do one (or two) on a monthly basis just so I can drone on and on hehe. Sure the poems are a little insight into my life but they're more cryptic versions... pieces with no names mentioned, which is the way I like them. :)

So I thought I'd have this post and possibly the next one be a little more of the detailed updates - not of the poetry kind.

First off things are really taking off for me. 2010 is the year where I wanted to apply for an internship to get my writing career kick-started and whatnot (It was one of my goals for 2010). Like I said previously, the TAFE marks that I received were awesome and I feel like they were just the thing I needed to give me that push for me to keep doing what I'm doing. Like it was a sign for me to take that next step in achieving my dream, as corny as that sounds...

Last night I went to a farewell for my best friend, a close girlfriend and another mate and instead of all the sad stories and reminiscing, we all took it as a time to catch up and quickly say what we wanted to say until the time we would see each other again.

I admit there were tears when I gave my close girlfriend a card with what I wanted to say to her. I've never been one to say words out loud, in a sense, and the affect that what was written on the card had on her was exactly what I wanted - needless to say there were a little bit of tears and a few hugs. Gonna miss you my dear and will never forget how we first met :) I know you're coming back but that'll be a while yet. xx

My best friend is leaving sooner than ever and I probably didn't get to spend as much time with her as I would have liked to but we caught up and I know she's coming back before I realise how quickly the time has passed. I swear, if she was leaving indefinitely, I probably would have cried a puddle of tears last night but she's going on a big adventure in the next few months and a well-deserved holiday at that! Love you D. xx

As if our group didn't have only a few girls already... now two more are leaving. Boo!

Okay enough of sad news... onto the good!

So like I said at the beginning, I feel like 2010 is going to be my year, career-wise that is, and the past 2-3 weeks has already proven that to me. First off, I talked to my manager about wanting to apply for an internship this year and I wanted to get her thoughts on that. My manager and I are pretty close as far as work relationships go and I'm so glad I received the approval from her to 'go for it'. She knows that I want to move on from my current role and she expects it. Actually, she expected me to move on a while ago hehe

So good news #1.

#2: This may have been a big sign but when I walked out of that meeting (with my manager), I received an email from [Melbourne magazine] Acclaim - it was one of their weekly newsletters - and the content within it was that they were looking for interns! I was a little hesitant in applying coz the internship would be in Melbourne and if I were to get it I would have to figure out a whole bunch of things - i.e flights, leave, accomodation, etc.

I talked to one of my good mates asking for advice and he said to just go for it so I thought it over myself and decided to take the advice of him and my manager and applied.

#3: Got home and received my TAFE marks for the last semester, which if you guys read my blog often, you'll know what I got. Otherwise refer to previous post - 'Results'.

#4: A few days later, I received an email from Mariam, Digital Editor for Universal Music Australia, and I totally forgot that I had randomly applied for this role and well basically her news was that she was happy to have me on as a reviewer for one of their sister sites. This gig is unpaid but in exchange I get free CDs (on a fortnightly basis) and hopefully and eventually, concert tickets. Fingers crossed!

#5: The week after, I received an email from [sub-editor of Acclaim] Alex, letting me know that whilst they couldn't offer me the internship because of the whole location thing, she suggested that I write for the site/blog instead! I was stoked! Even if the role is unpaid, for the moment, the more important thing to me is getting the experience and the exposure. Check out my pieces at www.acclaimmag.com and look out for the BY line hehe :0)

This has been my first week at writing for Acclaim and I'm loving it. At the farewell last night, I had all my friends telling me how proud they were of me! Soo happy! Ah it feels so good to be loved hehe which kind of contradicts what that fortune teller told me last weekend...

Well I'm gonna end this post right here but dont worry, my next update will be about that fortune teller haha

Enjoy the weekend!
Peace yo.
x
chauie

Results

I received my results for last semester earlier this week and the news had me feeling positive for the rest of the week!

The good news (and what I was hoping) is that I passed everything.
The even greater news is I received two distinctions and a credit!
Not bad for my first semester :)

I guess the late nights, the stressing and the struggles of the (dis)organisation and (mis)communication between me and the other students was all worth it.

I was telling my workmate that I've never received anything higher than a credit.
When I was still at Uni, I just crossed my fingers and hoped for a pass, rather than a fail.

The results put a stamp on the fact that I'm doing the right thing by studying for this course.
That I'm headed in the right direction.

I'm so happy!
I told my mum that night and she couldn't help but make a negative comment, but all in all, she was happy too. It's so hard to please her! :/

x
chauie

Happy New Year yo!

2009 has ended and 2010 has officially started and I think it's the perfect time for all of us (me, especially) to let go of all we know so we can grow. May it be the bad or the good, we shouldn't let our past define us.

I want to re-enter this world as a twenty-three year old with a different outlook on life. I want to welcome the perspectives of others before I make major (or drastic) decisions concerning my own happiness and well-being.

But in saying that, at the end of the day I want to make a decision (whether it be good or bad, right or wrong) on my own and if it happens to be the wrong one, I want to learn from the mistake and not repeat that same (bad) decision twice.

2010 may only have started but there a couple of things that have been said and some may have started at the end of 2009 that may linger onto 2010 that have me excited for what's to come in the near future.

I want to have a more open mind in the future.

I know I can't completely change my mindset and that there will be a lot of times when I'll stay true to myself and the person I am but for the most part, I'd like to have a more open mind and give certain individuals a chance if the time and place calls for it.

Like I've mentioned in a previous post, there are handful of goals that I'd like to achieve this year. They're not necessarily my New Year's Resolution(s), but just a list of goals that I hope to achieve by 31 Dec 2010. Granted, all of them may not be achieved but I've got at least one goal for every part of my life - work, study, friends, family and me.

Some are long-term and I know personally that I will not complete some of these goals by 31 Dec but I'd like to try and get started on it if time permits me to.

Anyhow, I'll stop here for now - they'll be plenty more to write in 2010 and I'm looking forward to it! :)

May we all have a great 2010 ahead of us!
Happy New Year yo!

Thanks for reading/following/dropping by whenever you have a moment,
x
chauie

The Odd One Out

It's two days before 2010 and I'm anxious to find out what the year has in store for me.
I turned 23 (approximately) two weeks ago and it seems like things are already taking a positive turn for me.
Since the night of my birthday dinner, it's like I've woken up even more in a sense.
I have a handful of personal goals that I'd like to acheive by 31 Dec 2010.
But even if I only achieved one of those goals and complete it whole-heartedly, I'd be happy.

2009 was the year thay begun the search of being my own person...
I stood up against my parents and told them what I wanted.
After 22 years, they had to know me by now right?
Sometimes that statement feels like the exact opposite.
But as much as my family want me to be like them in life, share the same attributes and whatnot, for the first time I don't mind being the odd one out.
I don't mind not being the one that doesn't fit in.
I don't mind being misunderstood.

I've felt the feeling of it for years now but now I feel I can finally accept it.
I know my opinions and thoughts have always been different to those of my family members and relatives and at this moment, I'm honestly okay with it.

Peace and love,
chauie

Indefinitely

Okay so here's part 2 of previous post 'Ignorant', one I've aptly titled as 'Indefinitely'.

(Written 3rd December 2009)

There is a reason why
I
No longer share my news with you
News, whether it be good or bad.
I heard the surprise in your voice
When?
The first time you found out I was studying again
And I always had a feeling
That you thought I could never do it.
I just needed time away and for myself
To figure it all out
But you thought I was just wasting it.

I'm glad I proved you wrong
I'm glad I no longer have you in my life
(At least not my personal one)
I don't need you
Or your discouraging words bringing me down

Your recent behaviour
Has confirmed to me
Indefinitely
That you're no good for me
And it's best that I walk away now
And leave you (coughing) in the dust...


x
chauie
'Now all I battle is your ego and your pride. It's ticking like a time bomb, ready too ignite. Hurtin' me to fight.' - Wake Up, Alicia Keys

Gem

This week has been a real gem... I don't know if I'm being sarcastic with that word but let's just say it's a little bit of truth and sarcasm.

Two major assessments are done and have been handed in.
Finito.
It's left my hands
The weight has been lifted.
After two nights of barely any sleep...
After days of stressing and underestimation of time..
After hours of procrastination,
I can finally breathe a sigh of relief
*phew! :)

On the other hand...

Yesterday was a real winner. *cue sarcasm now*
Got into work early to leave early only finding out when I got in that the girl I asked to stay back called in sick. What a coincidence!
So I stayed back an hour.
Left the office just after 5.
Got to the train station and the trains had broken down.
Walked 45 minutes to get to a station with working trains in 38 degree weather.
Yay...

If you havent yet noticed, this post is just a vent.

I'm out - for now.
chauie
'Close my eyes and move to the back of my head. Where worries are washed out to sea' - Yesterday's Feelings, The Used

Five Elements

I've worked out that I have five elements of my life - family, friends, study, work and love - and of late, only one of those elements is really making me happy. It's also probably the last one you would expect.

(5) Family
Families are supposed to be supportive towards your decisions in life, right?
Not mine.
My family always seems to question my choices.

(4) Love
My love life sis currently non-existent so there's not much to comment here but I'm not bitter about it. I've said this before and I'll say it again: I don't mind being single.
And I get that friends wanna set me up in hopes that I'll (eventually) be as happy as they are but we all have our own definition of happiness.
We all have different things in our life that makes us estatic and feel complete bliss.
That's why no two people are exactly the same.

(3) Work
Well if you're a regular reader of my blog (first off, thank you! hehe), you should know how I feel about work. But seriously though, with all the 'talking' that goes on, I don't know why people stay.
I don't even know why I'm still here.
I used to have reasons why I stuck around but now, even those reasons are fading away.

There was a toss-up between the last two elements. Both are what I love and hold close to my heart. But there was one that slightly held the upper hand in terms of my 'happy' levels, especially within the past couple of weeks.

(2) Friends
This is not directed to all my friends.
I just feel a bit out of the loop with some of them and it's not a great feeling...
To not know what is going on around you but have everyone else aware is a bit scary.
It's like I'm living in a bubble and I have no idea...
It's kinda sad when I really think about it. Sometimes it makes me feel like I'm the outsider looking in - even when I'm in the midst of it all.

And finally,
(1) Study
I told you it was the least expected one but honestly it's the only thing that's really providing a positive light into my life at the moment.
Knowing that I went out of my way to go out, research and apply for the course without asking for help or advice from others was good for me.
Doing something on just my own terms gave me a (thin) layer of confidence and was somewhat rewarding.

In the past, I've always let the voices of others influence my final decisions, but this time, I did this all on my own and initially (after I enrolled) I didn't even tell anyone that I'd done it - gone and taken that big step! Not until maybe a few weeks later, I slowly started revealing my (future) plans.

Even now, not all of my friends and family know. And coming from a highly competitive (academic-wise) and judgemental family (mainly the extended), I thought it was best to only tell my immediate...

It took me a while but I'm glad I finally realised what I wanted to do.
Through all the ups and downs, the fails and passes, I realise now they don't really matter anymore coz I didn't go about living my life based on those events.
I finally know what makes me happy and how I can incorporate what with how and hopefully achieve that complete sense of pure bliss. :0)

**A change is coming. **

Peace.
chauie
'Some people say that I'm not worth it. I've made mistakes but nobody's perfect. Guess I'll give it a try.' - One Last Chance, James Morrison

Stepping Back Onto the Academic Footpath

So if you would have read my previous post last night, there was a blink and you'll miss it part where I mentioned that I'd be going back to school for further study. I know it may be a bit of a contradiction after ranting on in 'Untitled' that a piece of paper meant shit to me. But I just wanna say that, for me, I'll be doing a course that I actually want to do.

Yes, me. The girl that has never liked studying is going to be stepping foot into a classroom once again. Well a lecture room in this case. But honestly, I've never liked school. I was never one to strive academically.

You see, the thing is I've recently hit a bit of a crossroads where I didn't really know where I stood in life - career-wise, at least. With friends, I'm the quiet one but I like to party hehe. With family, I'm kinda like the black sheep. That's how I see it anyway. How I think they see me. Not just my immediate, but those in my extended too. Oh well.

But with the rest of my life, I'm a bit lost to be honest. I've never known what I really wanted to do in life. Okay, maybe I've always known but there was always obstacles in the way of me achieving that goal. Being able to hit that target. And there was one big obstacle that's always been there and probably will always be: my parents.

Sometimes I question it though, like 'Aren't they supposed to support me in the decisions I make?' Not steer me in a different direction instead? Like when I said I was going to study Design. I remember one of the first reactions was 'But that's not going to make you any money?'

I know that comment is going to open up a can of worms. Open up an old wound for me too. A wound that never seems to want to heal.

But just to let you know, I've only told my mum and I told her not to tell my brothers coz they all live in the same mindset as my parents where they wanna work in roles that will just lead them to lots of paper (cash). But I don't give a shit about that. I've always known I've been the different one in my family. I don't care for the cash and fame that most young kids aspire for.

Don't get me wrong, I love famous people and meeting them is always a fun and exciting feeling but I don't think I'd ever want to be famous. Most people are nobodies until they turn into somebodies. But for me, I'm a nobody that wants to stay a nobody. I don't care for the limelight, the spotlight, whatever you want to call it. I'm happy being in the background. It's a role that I've gotten used to. And if I ever do get thrown in the limelight, I don't think I'd mind a little bit of it... I just don't know if I could handle it on my own.

The course I'm studying though may lead me to talking to those in the 'industry' but that's all I want. To talk to those in the industry. I'm not looking to be an extra in a film. I don't want to be a girl in no clothes shaking her ass in a video. And my voice would probably break windows if i ever stepped on stage. So therefore I'm quite happy with the thought of being behind the camera rather than being in front of it.

The only time you'll ever see me in front of a camera is when I'm taking a photo with someone. I'm rarely alone in a pic. I avoid it as much as possible. Also, with people in the photo, I can let them dominate the photo as much as they want to and I can just fade into the back behind them.


I have a theory that there are two types of people in this world - that you grow up and fall into two categories: smart and beautiful. Unfortunately for me I didn't really fall into either one. But I guess now, I'm going to try to fall into the first coz I know it's too late for the latter (see 'Untitled Pt 2').

Anyways my course starts July 20th which is the week after my Writing Course finishes so perfect timing I'd say. I really hope I can commit to these classes and finally head into the direction of where I want to be.

Peace yo...
chauie