Scarily True

My horoscope for today is scarily true in terms of my current mood:

"What in the world is going on? On the one hand, you have thoughts that are rather humanistic and harmonious about both your family and your career. But on the other hand, you also have a deep desire to destroy everything in order to start fresh!"

This morning I felt confident. More than I have about myself in a while.
It's wierd coz I had less than 5 hours of sleep, bad coffee and a boring brekky and yet, that didn't deter my mood.

Maybe I'm still on a high from the Lupe Fiasco concert last night...
(Hopefully will get to do a review on that early on this week)

Yesterday I went to the temple again to pray for all the bad things /luck/spirits to be gone and not have them affect me (and my family) this year and I came to the conclusion that this year is the year for my career to take off. Scary that today's horoscope thinks so too..

And I'm talking about my dream career of writing... my current career role, on the other hand might be relevant to the flipside of the abovementioned horoscope.

I do have a desire to rid myself of this life. Everything that comes with it.
Except my writing - it's the only thing that keeps me sane.
Recently, I've had a strong desire to quit. Not just my current role but some people in my life.
Sometimes I don't know why I still engage in conversation with them.

Guess it's still a question that is left to be unanswered.. and will be unanswered for a little while methinks.

Til then, I'm hoping my mini escape to Melbourne will help this week.

Peace out yo.

Update: Balance

I've had a really good 24 hours.

I planned to do nothing this weekend, but last night, I went over to a mate's place and watched him and one of my best mates make beats and experiment with their DJ equipment. It was pretty crazy to watch and listen to whilst I was lost in my own thoughts.

I've been a little paranoid with one of my mates thinking he was pissed at me but last night we hung out / chilled / vibed and talked and it was just like old times.

It was something that I was definitely missing.

After last night, I feel like my life has reached somewhat of a balance.

Before last night, I had hardly seen any of my friends face-to-face for almost a month coz of all the craziness that had been happening - re: work, friends, writing, planning, family. But last night, it was good to see my best mate and not have any animosity or tension between us.

Anyways I've got a busy week ahead of me: concerts, class, work and my mini holiday to Melbourne! Can't wait!

- Going to check out Lupe Fiasco tonight at the Enmore and Jimmy Eat World tuesday night. Don't know if I'll do any reviews on either gigs but we'll see what happens.
- Class and work is part of my normal schedule although I'll want to speed through those hours hehe
- Thursday I jump on a plane to head down to Melbourne for a trip that will be both business and pleasure :)

Oh by the way, finally saw (one of my favourite artists) Kid Cudi live and whilst it probably wasn't the best time of my life, I'm still happy I got to experience it! Hopefully he'll come back soon and do some shows. Fingers crossed in the meantime.

As for that guy whom has recently entered in my life and could be a potential? Things are going alright for the moment and whilst I haven't told many people about it... I'm okay with things for now. At the moment, if things don't work out... I think I'll be okay. Key word: think haha

Anyways I'm outta here.
Gotta get ready and stuff.
Peace and love yo.
x
chauie

Chinese New Year: Year of the Tiger

February 14 may have been Valentine's Day for a lot of you, but for me, it marked the date of the beginning of Chinese New Year.

Not like I have a significant other, so I was completely fine with the fact that the day clashed with the Hallmark holiday. Some people in my family were less than pleased... lol

So I've decided as my (Chinese) new year's resolution to rid myself of the old and welcome the new. Now this shall/could be applied to every aspect of my life: friends, work, love.. and especially old habits.

I've decided that it's time for me to let go of the past and embrace the future. I really hope I can do it.

Plus, this year celebrated the Year of the Tiger (which I am), so I really hope 2010 is the year for me.

My mum read my Chinese horoscope for me for the next 12 months and whilst there are some good points there, there's also some sour months. The good points are directed towards my career and work but I want 2010 to bring luck to me in other elements.

Either way, the Chinese horoscope is usually on point every year for me and my family so I hope those good things do happen...

Til then, guess I just gotta take it one day at a time.
Peace yo.
chauie

The Result of Too Much Wine

So sometime last month, I was catching up with an old friend over too many glasses of wine at the hotel she was staying at and we were talking about everything from our careers to family, friends and of course the opposite sex. For some reason, that topic always gets saved for last hehe ;)

The weekend after she left and went back to her interstate home, she emailed me and confessed that at one point of the night, I had left the room to take a call or gone to the bathroom or something and so she decided to have some fun and so jumped on my Facebook and, well for those of you who have a Facebook account, you'd know that often Facebook suggests which people you should befriend because you have "mutual friends"... (How convenient that she decided to confess after she left Sydney!)

Well she added a whole bunch of random boys that she thought was cute coz she, like everyone else in my life, thinks i've been single long enough. As if Facebook is the perfect way to start LOL

Anyways... she didnt know who she added or how I could get rid of the requests... but after I got angry at her, I googled it and I sent out a mass message to all these "pending friend requests" kinda telling them about my friend, how she was under the influence and that they could ignore the request, but if they wanted to add me, then that that was fine and that I'm not a crazy lunatic hehe

So one guy added me and I randomly sent him a Facebook msg saying thanks and asked a simple question - breaking the ice so to speak - coz let's face it, I was feeling bad for not making an effort to get to know him. I didn't expect a reply back but surprisingly when I logged on today, he had replied and needless to say, a small smile appeared on my face.

Also wanna give a quick shoutout to two good friends on their engagement! Keeping my lips sealed on their names as they haven't announced it yet hehe :0)

x
chauie

The Friend Zone

She likes you
And I'm not talking about me
But even if I were to tell you
You'd think I was crazy
It's pretty obvious
By the words that she speaks
I'm sure she wants more
When she kisses your cheeks
It doesn't seem like you're doing much
When you're working together
But I'm sure you talk about lots of things
Other than the weather
I've seen the photos
I've seen the look on her face
I bet she was wishing
She was in your embrace
But you're so clueless
And she can't tell you a thing
Coz she's scared of your reaction
And doesn't wanna end up as a fling

I kinda lied earlier when I said it wasn't me
But only when I meant she's not alone, she's not the only one
And now I'm scared
To let my feelings become undone
I've had my eye on you for awhile now
But you never would have known
Coz I analyse my moves too much
For fear I'll end up in the friend zone
I haven't seen you since that last time
And I hate the feeling of not being aware
Do you like me or do you not?
To ask this question, I do not dare
Coz I am scared
Of what may become
I'll be biting my nails
Waiting for the outcome
Coz what if your answer is my worst nightmare
What will happen then?
I guess all I really wanna know is
When will be the next time that I'll see you again?
Coz it's been way too long
Since the last time we locked eyes
I wish I had answered you back
That night when you said hi
But I walked away for a second
Hoping you'd still be there when I got back
But you weren't in the place where you once were sitting
And I was left in a room that was almost pitch black

I was inspired to write in this format after watching too many Def Jam Poetry clips online - anyways I hope you like it. Sorry for the length - I was in my element :)
Peace yo!
chauie
'From the day I saw you, I really really want to catch your eye. There's something special 'bout you. I must really like you, Cause not a lotta guys are worth my time' - You Don't Know My Name, Alicia Keys