Existence

I was sitting in class earlier tonight and I started having second thoughts about it all.
But I think it went further than just me not wanting to be in class.
It was more about whether I should be here at all.

My existence.

Would it really matter to anyone if I was here or not?
If I disappeared for a week, how long would it take you to realise that I was missing?
If I shut off my phone and left my emails unread, what would happen?
What would you do?
Would you know if I had gone into hiding?

I don't see a lot of people on a regular basis. I have 300+ friends on Facebook and I see maybe 10% of them on a weekly basis. I reckon I could go on living life for about a month and end up only seeing 10 and that's only because of the people I work with.

But for some 'friends', though they say they'll keep in touch, there have hardly been any signs o that being true: no missed calls, no emails, no txt msgs.. not even a comment on my wall to say 'Hi'...

Next week, I'm on a two-week break from class and I've decided to really re-assess my life.
Taking the advice of my workmate, I'm going to re-assess the 'friends' I have too.

It feels like it's time for a change.

Chopping my hair off.
Re-assessing my life.
Organising my home-life.
Re-assessing my friends.
Changing my attitude.

I hope doing these abovementioned things will push me and give me an extra dose of much-needed confidence.
I went to a workshop at work today and leaving this particular session, left me with three key things that I needed to do. One of which was: "LEARN TO SAY NO!"

I'm out.
x
chauie
'I don't go with yesterday no more (Ooh). Now I'm feeling free (I'm feeling free). Today tomorrow told me (What it say?). That's where I should be (That's where I should be)' - T.O.N.Y, Solange Knowles